Posts

A Year of Absence

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It's been just under a year since I last wrote for this blog. I don't really know why I stopped, but I guess life just gets busy and you get caught up in so much that you don't take time to reflect. But I think that's what I need to do now. It's been a very eventful year from last April to now. My partner and I got our own flat, I passed my driving test, and we went on a few small breaks in between around Scotland. We spent a lot of time with friends and family, went to a wedding, and welcomed my nephew to the world. The past month or so, however, has been challenging. The Coronavirus crisis has put almost the entire world on hold and has really affected the UK in the past few weeks. My life has been sort of flipped upside down in this crisis due to my employment situation. I won't go in to too much detail but, in a nutshell, I was due to start my first proper full-time job (what I thought would be the start of my career) a few weeks ago. On my start date

The importance of LGBTQ+ education today

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In November 2018, the Scottish Government made the monumental move of making LGBTQ+ inclusive education compulsory in the Scottish education system. This is a move that will likely save many lives and make young LGBTQ+ individuals feel safe and included with their peers. LGBTQ+ inclusive education is an essential in 2019, and it is a fact that school curriculums must come to terms with. We teach young people to be respectful and considerate at school, yet bullying against LGBTQ+ people is still prevalent. Looking back on my own experience of being a young LGBTQ+ individual, I now realise that it was isolating and lonely in some ways. Despite never feeling overtly uncomfortable with being gay, and despite having a good support network of friends and family, I feel that I was quite reserved and, in some ways, felt that I couldn't fully express who I was until I was in my final year of high school. Perhaps if LGBTQ+ inclusive education was part of the curriculum from a young age

Male Suicide and Mental Health - Break the stigma, save a life

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Content warning: this blog post discusses suicide and mental health issues that some readers may find upsetting. Samaritans has produced a full research report about male suicide called which can be read  here . Suicide and poor mental health is something which is still very under-discussed in society, in my opinion, and is something that people need to be more open about. Whilst suicide affects both males and females, males are at a higher risk of suicide than females. In the UK, men are three times more likely than women to commit suicide, with the highest suicide rate being men aged 40-44 in 2017  (read the full 2017 suicide report by Samaritans here) . Data collected by Samaritans indicates that male suicide supersedes female suicide in all age categories, however, and in all areas of the UK. The 2017 report did also find that female suicide is on the rise and male suicide dropped a little from 2016 though, according to Samaritans, it is too early to tell whether this is a n

Why I love to write but hate talking about it

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Writing is something I have always enjoyed and, in recent years since starting this blog, it has become an outlet for me to express how I am feeling. In my final years of high school, for assignments, I began writing about issues which were very close to me - in particular, as I grew more comfortable with my sexuality, I used my writing to understand what I was going through and how I came to understand my sexual orientation. I started this blog to provide a public space for me to comment on my life's experiences and what I was making of the world around me. As my blog has grown, writing has become more important to me and has been an essential part of my life as I progress into adulthood. My writings come from a place deep inside and are cathartic in nature - they allow me to expel my (potentially corrosive) thoughts and emotions in a healthy and safe way. Writing allows me to connect and engage with what is happening inside my head, giving me a space to analyse and understan

No, but where are you REALLY from?

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The title of this post is a question that I have been asked many times, usually after I have said I was born and grew up in Livingston (a town in Scotland). It is a question that could be rephrased to "what is your ethnic background?" or "where are your parents from?" - though the need for this type of question to be asked at all is questionable in itself, unless it is the topic of conversation already. What I take from this question is "you can't be from Scotland, you're not white" and so I must divulge into the long spiel about my family background to appease their curious mind, after which they seem to switch off. I am mixed race. My mother was born in Singapore and my father was born in Scotland. It is a mix I am proud of, and one which has enabled me to experience so much more in life than many others may not be able to. However, living in a country where you do not exactly look like everyone else will of course lead to these types of que

Afterlife

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The following is a poem inspired by a dream I had a while ago - or, rather, a nightmare. The dream itself was terrifying, and words can barely convey the fear I felt waking up. Here I lie with my family around me. The beeps of the heart monitor becoming less and less frequent. My breathing becomes strained, Chest struggling to cope as if a weight presses down on me. I know what awaits me, and I am at peace with it. Death will come as a relief, The long battle is almost over. It will not be a victory from me this time, But I have said my farewells and am ready. Feeling the darkness set in, My eyes begin to cloud over. I give a last smile to my dearest who squeezes my hand one last time, Trying their best to hold on to that last glimmer of life. Feeling my warmth one last time before my soul is taken. Forming memories, however painful they are. As I prepare for the inevitable, I take one last deep breath in. The smell of the ward is not one I had hoped for, But

'Feud' and the Loneliness of Fame

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The TV anthology series Feud  hit the screens in March 2017 in America. When I first heard that Ryan Murphy was creating a television show based on the feuds of pop culture icons and that the first series would be starring Jessica Lange and Susan Sarandon, I was filled with excitement of what was to come. However, as the show was not aired in the UK at the same time, I was not able to keep up to date with each episode so had to wait until this week when the BBC aired the show on UK television and provided the whole series on BBC iPlayer. I have since became engrossed in the series and it is proving to be more enjoyable than I would have thought. As this is a television show review/analysis, the content of this post will contain some spoilers. The first season of the show presents a dramatisation of the famous Hollywood feud between Bette Davis and Joan Crawford - focussing on the one film they starred in together What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?, the promotional tour which followe